In studying John 1-4 everyday at Urbana, I read about what it means to be a Christ-follower, what Jesus expects of us to commit to him and the salvation that Jesus wants us to receive. But upon reading these versus, I felt God challenging what I've been doing this last semester.
Personally, in the semester in which I've been doing the most "for Jesus," he really turned over my tables, specifically in areas in which I expected to receive my just rewards(academically,spiritually, physically) and questioned what I've been doing. The first verse I was drawn to in the bible study was John 1:38, where the disciples are informed that the passerby is Jesus, and they rush to follow him. Instead of telling them what the plan/schedule is starting at that time, Jesus asks them "What do you want?" I realized that if Jesus had asked me the same question at any point in the semester, I'm not so sure my answer would be to follow Jesus and know where he is living so that I could be with him and experience his presence. It would have been more like maybe I could get some good grades or maybe I could help AAIV prosper or maybe Jesus could bring the resurrection party to my house on my terms.
This shows up again in John 2:4. Jesus' mother informs Jesus that there is no more wine, so that maybe Jesus can use his power to fix the problem to prevent putting shame onto the host family. Jesus questions her as to why she involves him, to which she equips him with servants and leaves the situation to his discretion. Again I felt Jesus challenging me. I feel like I've only been calling on Jesus out of necessity, my own greed or because it should be his job because he can fix all problems; not out of faith that his plans are and always will be enough for me.
Jesus challenged me the same way he challenged Nathanael and Nicodemus, by reminding me that only through faith in his plans can I spend eternity with him and I am excited and ready yet cautious for his plans for this new semester.
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